Hello Lovelies: an apology April 5, 2008

I know I’ve not been around for, like, ever.  I’ve been kicking myself and trying to get inspired, but then I just gave in.  I think I just need to take a hiatus and my desire to blog will bubble forth naturally from my belly into my hands like foamy sick.

 

…and if you still care, you can read it then.  

 

Until then…and I’m pretty sure this day will come…check out one of my new top blogs vlogs:

illdoctrine.com

he’s a hiphop writer/blogger who I think has a great perspective on life. Well, at least the stuff I’ve heard him talk about. He should date me, too.

So…I’m out for a bit longer, but don’t you think that since I’ve come back to (semi-)explain my absence that maybe I’m on the road to bloggity recovery?

see you soon

love,
himbly
H 

movies n’ such January 5, 2008

I’m back.  Been awhile since I’ve written on the ol’ bloggity. School finished for me (ie. I finished my last paper) on the 20th and it has been a whirlwind of holiday excitement since. Until about 3 days ago, when I planted my ass and refused to budge. I am officially ~relaxing~.Part of my relaxation/holiday has been to see a couple of movies. I think my years as a projectionist made me appreciate more the fun of going to a matinee solo. I saw The Golden Compass and Juno.The Golden Compass…apparently there’s been a fuss? Something about atheism? I didn’t see it, but then I am a heathen non-believer and also it’s apparently more prevalent in the sequel(s). Overall, I enjoyed it. But I enjoyed it like I do most adventure/Harry Potterish movies…probably will never see it again and will forget what it’s all about next week, anyway. Coveted the costumes, though. Dang.I have, as of the past year or so, become more sensitive. Perhaps not in the good way, but I will cry at the drop of a well timed hat. I hate that. It’s taken away my desire to see so many movies that I would otherwise probably check out. All I need is a mournful string section and I’m dabbing at my eyes with kleenex. Gad…what a sap I am! Anyway, the friendship that develops between the girl and the bear put me over the edge a few times. Really. Wtf?

I’m going to write about Juno in a different post. I am clearly in the minority on this one, so I have to concentrate on writing it properly…back in a sec.

Found Magazine December 19, 2007

This is a reading done by the founder of Found magazine. Too lazy right now to link to it, but it is a fantastic website.

The reading is hilarious.

The day the adults left so that little girls could finally live alone with bunnies and monkeys December 7, 2007

Heeeeee…this build your own world site is fun!  

My version of the apocalypse

Fun times over at the Veer.com website where you can build your own world.  Perfect for when you’re procrastinating that special paper.  

Been busy December 5, 2007

But enjoy the nerdalicious goodness:   via Pharyngula 

posts looking like ass these days November 29, 2007

Sorry about my posts and their bad formatting these days.  I’m trying to get used to the new stuff that wordpress threw at me.

“Great Scott”, I mean “Knockers” November 24, 2007

Okay.  This.   

It’s been confusing a lot of women lately. Dang, I can’t get it to embed here. Click on the link for the Heidi Klum Victoria’s Secret ad with her “great knockers”.   Anyway, It’s been confusing me lately, for certain.  And lilithattack, too.    

 So, last night I was out with lilith and gerbils and she and I got to talking.   We talked about this ad and why, even though we both wanted to like it for some reason, we just couldn’t.  I’ll outline the reasons here for me, and although lilith and my arguments both for and against were similar, I am not going to presume to speak for her.  Go to her blog…she writes better than me for one thing.  

 1- arguments for Heidi Klum pretending her boobs are machine guns

I wanted to like this ad. I really did want to.  I was very torn watching it.  I sat like a dog watching a cat dancing with a top hat on TV…ie. confused and uncomfortable.  And I think I figured it out.  I wanted to like that ad because it took away some of the mystique that surrounds the female body.  The female body has been taken to be such a damn serious thing…sacred…womb bearing…that the humour in it has gone away.  Our bodies, if you own one you know this, are hilarious and weird.  Nooks, crannies, dampness, dryness, lumps, bumps, humps…my humps, my lovely lady lumps.  Check it out:  we ought to rejoice in the fact that we can squeeze our boobs and make honking sounds.  Sarah Silverman, whom I love, devoted an entire episode of her brilliant show (it is too brilliant)  to queefing.  These things are important so that men can’t be the only ones that fart.

 2- argument against Heidi Klum yelling about her great knockers 

 Well..she does have great knockers.  Actually, in that commercial, they are so big they kinda freak me out.  Basically, I think I like the concept of that ad but Heidi Klum is all wrong for the role.  And not because she’s blonde, skinny, rich, famous, and gorgeous.  It’s because…and I mean no real offense to her…she just doesn’t pull it off for me.  She seems, how do I put this…she seems to have that “hot girl” sense of humour, which is less funny and more ‘hey, that hot chick is doing weird shit’.  Don’t pretend you didn’t know these girls in high school or your undergrad.  Or now, even.  I vote for the aforementioned Sarah Silverman.  Or Naomi Campbell because that chick has got issues.  Or what about less model-y women?  Why not make a series of women who love their knockers?  How weird would Dita Von Tease be?

 Now that I’ve said it, I’m wondering if that’s why the commercial is so heavily edited.  Because they filmed HK for an hour and came up with 30 seconds of ‘okay-good-enough-lets-wrap-up’ stuff? 

(ugh.  Wordpress changed shit and now I’m a bit confused.  Sorry if this post looks like ass.)

 

Truly amazing November 23, 2007

So, I’ve not been around too much lately due to my mad catch-up skillz.  I’m in the midst of 3 experiments this week which leaves me many days of full on ‘sperimentin’ and evenings for little more than a/ working or b/ passing out.  It’s the end of the semester, you see, and I have papers to write. By way of keeping people coming here, I’m offering this vid.  It is absolutely incredible and if your jaw doesn’t drop at some point, then you’re the most hardened mofo I’ve ever come across.  Enjoy!    

“you should do your thesis on the word “fuck”” November 2, 2007

…and other things I’ve heard over 20 times…

This open letter from eternally stressed semanticist (via language log) made me laugh.

Top Vid Rally November 1, 2007

The other day I posted a list of what I’ve nominated as some of the best videos of all time. I’ve since realized that some weren’t as great vids as they were songs, and perhaps even just people I admire/have crushes on.

So, lilithattack responded in my comments and then on her blog, correctly reminding me of the genius of Chris Cunningham’s video for the Aphex Twins’ Windowlicker.

Bumf also nominated some substantial contenders in this best vid campaign. Some of his picks included: Beck ‘Girl’, anything by Radiohead, and Paul Simon ‘You Can Call Me Al’.

I suggest, then, we have a little rally. I mean, so difficult to really pick the top ten vids of all time, so it might be fun to post more suggestions.

For instance, in light of lilithattack’s choice, I would like to go ahead and nominate another Chris Cunningham’s vids, having been introduced to it by her and gerbils at their house a couple of months ago:

Bjork ‘All Is Full of Love’

News from down the pipe October 26, 2007

Just found this out:

The DNA pioneer James Watson retired yesterday from his post as chancellor of Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory in New York state. The move is the coda to the race row that engulfed his visit to London last week following comments he made suggesting that black people were less intelligent than whites.

It was probably about time.

Also…I have yet to find a link to it (that isn’t written by some redneck who thinks that Ezra Levant’s article on the woman school bus driver who was involved in a fatal collision last week was some sort of strike for free speech) but I believe that Ezra Levant has been excused from further Sun writing.

Hey, pal…buck up. We don’t all get to write for newspapers and sometimes we just have to rely on our blogs. I’ve been to the Western Standard blog a fair amount of times to ‘discuss’ issues and if you you’re comfortable with the level of hatred and nonsense venomously spewed out in the lengthy comment sections, then maybe that’s the best place for you.

I’m curious about the editor who allowed that article to be published. And no…this has nothing to do with ‘hard issues’ and ‘free speech’…this has to do with Ezra running his mouth on stupid shit and someone giving him some paper to do it on. If he’s allowed to do that, I should have a space in the Sun to talk about how freaking tired I get sometimes (much like the lamer posts I write here) because they offer about the same amount of journalistic information. Zero.

Anyway…blah blah blah. I’m upset because I actually read some of the Western Standard’s blog today and I was pleased to see a few commenters standing up to Ezra and his ilk, but it’s pretty disgusting. Ugh. Here. Take a look. Warning, though, it is not for the faint of heart.

Anyway…Dr. James Watson looks like Mr. Dressup by comparison to Ezra Levant, but I think both of these men needed a little “time out”.

thanks lilithattack

awww….*snort*…awwwwww October 7, 2007

It seems to me that, unless I make an effort to go to bed at 11-11:30’ish, I get this crazy second wind that leaves me wide awake at 2am.

Generally speaking.

Anyway, that’s where I am. I’m up late because I felt as though I should get some more stuff done, but is it getting done? no. Hellllls no.

This, in turn, has made me a bit melancholy…and we all know what helps with melancholy, don’t we kids? Yes! If we’re going to be all sad and lonely and pensive, then we might as well get advice from the King:

You know, when you can’t outdo someone it just feels useless even trying. So, I cheered up.

Superbad and one of those things September 11, 2007

I just got home from seeing Superbad. Unless someone presents me with a teen flick filmed post-1989, I will deem it the best teen movie since the 80s. Admittedly, this may be in no small part due to my firm belief that Michael Cera embodies the same genius at 19 (or so) years old that Eddy Murphy did…just in a completely opposite way. So, not the same genius. A different kind of genius. What I”m saying is that he’s just as smart and funny.

this is to remind you of the old Eddy Murphy. Not the baby-denying, fat-suit wearing, jumper of the shark we’ve got now. Remember, he was about 19 when he did these SNL sketches.

this is to show you that the kid is funny…and only he’s 19, too. Also check out the internet series he and his friend did: Clark and Michael.

Anyway, I was driving home in the dark and pulled into a gas station to fill up Pepe, the German me-transporter. Now, I’m a girl…old to call myself a girl, maybe, but female nonetheless. Like most women, I have learned to trust my instincts and especially in the dark. A car pulled up about 20-30 meters behind me and, not liking that I can’t see someone in the dark, I turned around to look. Okay, I sound like I”m building suspense, but I’m not, so I’ll tell you now that nothing happened. Like, at all.

I looked at the car…just guaging my surroundings and this guy, probably in his 50s, was looking back at me. It kind of struck me as odd, so I kept my eye on him…in that way that told him that I was keeping my eye on him. He got out of his car watching me. I watched him, too. Not staring, but obviously aware of his position in relation to me.

Then I got a good look at him. He was just a regular guy. I felt bad a little…here was this guy who stopped in for a pop and chips knowing that this girl was not trusting him. He probably was a bit hurt that I chose him to find so untrustworthy that I couldn’t leave his walk from the car to the store unnoticed. I mean, that didn’t stop me from doing it, I’m not going to get surprised just because I feel bad for a guy…but just the same. It’s too bad things have to be that way.

where our heroine believes in omens…sorta September 9, 2007

caveat: When I feel the need to caputure my spiritual leanings in a word or two, I label myself ‘agnostic’. This is more a convention than anything, since the word agnostic seems to be to be broad enough to cover the gap from “not quite atheist” to “not anything I’ve heard of so far” fairly conveniently. What I do believe whole heartedly is, and I’ve mentioned this not too long ago, that there are many things I cannot, do not, and won’t be able to understand in this universe…and nor will any of us any time soon.

So, bearing this in mind, I shall continue on with my story.

I believe in omens. I believe in them like some people believe in astrology. Like, not the people who go to professional astrologists, but those ones who have a particular newspaper or magazine they like to read their horoscopes in because 60% of the time it give sound advice about something that vaguely resembles whatever it is they’re going through. My omens, however, are based entirely upon the viewer. I interpret them like dreams…one is only aware of one’s own mythology and so one is the only one able to interpret one’s dreams or omens accurately if one chooses to do so.

ha

Actually, I’m sure I’ve written about this before…actually, I know I have but it was a long time ago and I’m too lazy to search back. Something to do with squirrels and squeegie kids throwing pennies. Anyway..I’ve got a new one now and I’m not sure quite how to interpret it. But certainly, it means something.

Yesterday I was on my way to school to put in a couple of hours in the lab working on a project I’m involved in. This project includes major use of puppets, so I certainly enjoyed my saturday morning.

As I steered my bike out from the back alley, I saw tens of elderly lawnbowlers all dressed in white (their white hair made it even more noticeable) and it looked kinda neat against the manicured green grass, but I paid little attention and forgot about it until much later on.

Got to the lab. Did my work. Hopped on my bike.

On the bikepath coming home, I came across a small clearing where there was a little congregation involving a magpie or two, a bunch of crows (a murder, if you will…but I always think of a murder of crows being more populous and in flight), and a squirrel (very possibly a couple more…I passed this scene pretty quickly). All of these birds/animals were black. Chillin’. No one was fighting, humping, chasing off…just hanging out. Together. All black.

It wasn’t until a few hours later that I realized I saw the all white-clad human crew previous to the black-feathered/furred animal homies.

That’s gotta mean something, but I can’t tell what. Like I said before, only I’m able to interpret this for myself, but any guesses?