Firstly, I want to post this again. It’s hardly got anything to do with what I’m going to talk about, but I just want to have this vid available again:
I am another to jump on this woman’s bandwagon. Amy Winehouse is slightly crazy and monstrously talented…just the way I like my artists. Currently (as I am, embarrassingly, a celeb-gossip fan) I think she’s cracking a bit under the pressure and she seems to me to be one of those artists that was too busy persuing what she loved to understand what celebrity does to some people. I really hope she manages to pull it together and put her weight back on…she’s lovely.
Plus, i think she singlehandedly brought back the beehive as once gerbilsberlin and I observed while sucking on a sheesha pipe in a mediterranean restaurant. We hauled on that thing like it contained the antidote. I guess with clean livin’ comes simpler pleasures. Actually, it’s partly for him and platypus that I’m posting the above because I want you guys to watch it if you haven’t already. She’s amazing and I’m too lazy to email it right now. Ha.
Anyway…as I was watching her, I began thinking about the celeb gossip that I’ve read. I no longer check the magazines (no idea if People cares about Amy Winehouse actually) but have a couple of websites (for instance) I frequent. I’ve noticed that, although she is, frankly, a mess right now…most writers at most sites will recognize her incredible talent and at least cheer her on towards good health.
Okay…so there’s that.
I went back to “a site” I would check in and comment at occassionally. “This site” (unnamed because…well..not sure why) has turned from a..well, I’m gonna just lay it out. This site is right wing-y and usually slightly political. I was a frequent commenter (I’m sure this story is all in my archives) but stopped because there was no getting through to some of the main contributers on certain issues. When one of my arguments was met with an inappropriate response from a fellow I will call ‘The Twerp’…and then a kudos to The Twerp by the head writer (who went, weeks later, to congratulate one of his (and my) visitors on being a gentleman…which he (you know who you are) certainly is, but wtf was with the kudos to Twerp making comments about wanting to see me naked if the head writer held ‘gentlemanly behaviour’ in such high stead?) I decided ‘eff this’ and didn’t go back.
But I do…occassionally. To look. And the place, in my ever so humble opinion, has become a den of subtle misogyny. The kind that doesn’t seem like misogyny…hell, they’d take a man down if they saw him hit a woman…but comes out in sophomoric jokes about breast sizes and aging. You know…they type of person who buys into the airbrushed shit that they get in their Maxim magazine and then feels that he, somehow, has the right to call out judgements.
Oh…especially if any one of these women dare speak up in a way that displeases those types of men.
What follows is not a particular attack on anyone one person/man…because I’ve heard this same shit dozens and dozens of times.
Himbly has a hangup, you may be saying to yourself. Yup. I probably do. Now, allow me to be politically uncorrect for a moment and I will explain myself.
One of my pet peeves is men who judge a woman as ‘fuckable’ or ‘un-fuckable’ by the phrase “I would hit that” (or whatever variant you choose). Especially when that fellow is an average guy…tryin’ to get by like the rest of us…who all of a sudden decides that, yes…THAT girl is good enough for him to fuck.
Wellllll, thank YOU Cassanova but usually men who say that type of thing are shooting for a target WAY out of their league. Take a good look at yourself and then take a look at her. You better be really damn funny, Chuckles, because there’s not much of a chance you’re going to ‘hit that’ unless you make her laugh so hard she forgets your pockmarks and love handles.
As I’ve explained to several of my female friends, I will now explain here. I can’t help it…but the thought that any man would think that he’s doing any woman a favour by fucking her is sooooo ludicrous…well…I am just without words. No I’m not. Here’s the deal.
If you are a guy and you say ‘I would hit that’ you are essentially implying that she is gagging for a taste of your lovin’ and you will do her a favour by giving her a piece. Just remember, lady, to control yourself. There’s too many women who want a piece of this. I don’t give a crap if you’re Brad Pitt…well, he may be a slight exception…but my point is that EVERY woman is doing your sweaty ass a favour by letting you fuck her.
Sexuality for a woman is an internal venture. We are curvy and soft to boot. Men, god bless you fellas…I most certainly am not a man hater…well, you guys are stinky and there are parts of you that I never ever need to see. And I’m talking about the well groomed ones here. Letting you into our bodies is a big favour from us to you and ‘hittin’ dat’, to me, is a macho cover up for what the hetro among you already know. If there’s a favour done…it’s you who owe us.
Imagine if someone, without asking, were to suddenly jab their finger into your mouth. Ear, even. Hell…let’s say it’s a close friend. That would be pretty shocking to the point of, ‘dude, wtf??’ Right? That’s just a small illustration of how you can’t compare our sexualities.
So..what does that have to do with a top ten list of the most revolting women on the planet? Again, link not provided because now it’s sorta specific. Well…I have certain celebs I dislike, too. But to list them as the top ten most revolting women on the planet…well…if you need to do so, can we leave their breast size out of the discussion, maybe? But…it’s the same principle. Who the eff is this guy to judge these more successful and public women because they might decide to speak out in a way that he doesn’t like and they’re not as pretty as he would like. If you have a particular beef, address that…like one does when they have an intellectual beef with someone. Or…OR…at the very least make it funny. I’ve linked Seanbaby’s open letter several times and as mean as it is, it’s funny to the point of tears. At least she attacked him (or Miguel) first.
Anyway…to wrap this up. My view on women vs men’s sexuality is mainly for the ‘casual sex/sexuality’ set. It’s a whole different story once a couple is in love. I’m just so tired of average fellas thinking they’re in some sort of position to judge women individually based on superficial attributes. How is it different from cat-calling in the street?
UPDATE: Link provided now because M’ville is apparently (and sadly) among the top 7 blogs in Canada and I rank barely n-zillionth.