Wait…that should read:
The Eggheads Are Revolting!
First, there was this:
“Astronomers are gathering in the Czech capital, Prague, hoping to define exactly what counts as a planet.” Essentially, Pluto has always been a bit of a question mark because of it’s size, distance, and eliptical orbit. Plus, it’s similar in shape to the skulls of those who found it in 1930. Eggy. This causes said orbit.
Ironically, in other news, it is Goofy, not Pluto, who’s status as a dog is under scrutiny. Pluto remains very acceptable as he is 4-legged and doesn’t talk.
The relatively recent discovery of celestial bodies that are just as planet-esque as Pluto have caused the scientists to venture into figuring this out once and for all. If Pluto is a planet so are at least 3 other objects in orbit around our sun and this is gonna cause one helluva headache for elementary teachers worldwide either way.
Pluto loses status as a planet. Ah…awww….crap. The astonomers in Prague make up guidelines and in order to be a planet in our solar system, one must:
– orbit around the sun
– be large enough that you take on a nearly round shape
– clear your orbit of other objects
Dang it! My aunt almost gained status as a planet!
So…Pluto is no longer a ‘planet’. I’m a Scorpio. I believe that Pluto is my ruling planet. This may be the reason I’ve been feeling so tired lately. I am going to check into it.
However…all is not lost (and I feel slightly perkier today):
Pluto vote ‘hijacked’ in revolt.
Huzzah! Hear that clanging??? That’s the cavalry…it’s difficult to carry telescopes on horseback.
Apparently there was some shenanigans that allowed bad science to prevail. Firstly, most of the astronomers went home by the time the Pluto vote took place, henceforth one word ‘Plutovote’. Also, the Plutovote that ~did~ take place was located in a very secret cavern underneath the ocean found only by piecing together clues…and everyone knows that’s no place for astonomers. Only wild haired chemists and physicists work there…and usually alone or in very very tight groups.
So…what will be the fate of our most beloved, if not chilly, planet/non-planet/dwarf planet/dog? Well, the dog’s gonna be fine (though remain totally lame), but the planet? Stay tuned.